Snark-Infested Waters by Mike Bailey

Snark-Infested Waters by Mike Bailey

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The rules for the care and feeding of reporters

I was inspired to write this after reading a similar essay posted for the benefit of webcartoonists. I thought I and my fellow reporters/journalists/bloggers could use the moral support.

What this is is a list of handy rules for readers on how to treat those of us who produce the news in print or on-line. We do not have an easy job, and it certainly is not made easier by dickish behavior from our customers, so please, o gentle reader, consider the following points:

Reporters are not perfect

I’m not a machine. I am a human being, ergo I am prone to making mistakes. Maybe I had insomnia and I’m trying to write my stories on a couple hours of sleep. Maybe something happened in my personal life (we have them) that is distracting me. Maybe it’s just a random brain cramp. We goof up sometimes. We try not to, but it’s inevitable we will make a mistake, sometimes a really bad one, and any diligent reporter will do their best to fix it, but to expect a flawless performance from us every time is unreasonable and unrealistic.

We’re not omniscient, either

A lot of times we make a mistake because we got bad information that we didn’t know was bad. A reporter is frequently called upon to learn a lot about an utterly foreign topic in a very short amount of time, and sometimes our sources of information give us bad intel, as the government likes to say, and we simply do not have the time to seek out other sources…and hey, so-and-so is supposed to be a renowned expert on Topic X, so why would we think him in error? Far more often than not, our error is never corrected because someone out there who knows we got it wrong doesn’t share that with us. Our goal is to provide accurate information, and you can help us do that by calling us on mistakes. It’s okay; we’re not made of glass.

We are not out to get you

If you are the subject of an unflattering story, it is not because we are vindictive jerks with an axe to grind. There’s a good chance we don’t even know you, and even if we do, a professional reporter knows to separate personal feelings from getting the objective facts out to the public. It’s not personal. And, frankly, maybe it’s your own damn fault. If you don’t want to be in the police logs, don’t get arrested (it’s not that hard. I’ve been arrest-free for all of my 39 years and I managed this with virtually no extraordinary effort). If you don’t want to be the subject of a searing expose, don’t embezzle money from your government job. If you don’t want us micro-analyzing your decisions on how to run a taxpayer-funded town department…well, make better decisions or don’t go into public service.

We are not your monkeys

Even large newspapers have finite resources. Small papers, their manpower is even more limited. We simply don’t have enough warm bodies and hours in the day to cover everything. If you ask for our attention and your story has merit, we will make the effort, but ultimately, we may have to say No, we can’t cover this and dedicate our time elsewhere. The small stories are what make community newspapers so valuable to the towns they serve, and in the current economic climate it’s what’s keeping them more financially stable than their large corporate-owned brethren, but the big stories that have an impact on everyone have to take precedence. If we have to decide between covering a selectmen’s meeting at which they plan to increase everyone’s property taxes and taking pictures of a grade school concert, there is no decision.

We are not your publicists

Our job is to convey information to the public. How we convey it is our purview. There is nothing that says we have to print your information exactly as you’d like it printed, or at all for that matter. If you send us a press release, we have the right to edit it down for space by, say, not using the half-dozen quotes that do not enhance the basic information. If we write a story about you, positive or negative, you don’t get to review it so it suits your tastes. You want something to appear verbatim? We have an ad department we’ll gladly refer you to.

We do not live in fear of the word “libel”

If you’re unhappy with something we printed about you, threatening us with a libel lawsuit will not bring about instant satisfaction. More likely, we will simply say You do what you feel you have to and hang up and move on to our next assignment. Libel is not simply a case of us writing something inaccurate (and it’s definitely not a case of us writing something that embarrasses you). There must be provable gross negligence and/or malice that resulted in a defamation of character.

We do not live in fear of losing readers or advertisers

You know what? It happens. Every so often we write something that cheeses off a reader or advertiser so badly they drop us like a hot rock. Obviously we do not set out to lose sources of income, but conversely, we don’t guard our every word for fear we might offend someone. That’s kind of our thing; the old reporter’s mantra is “Afflict the comfortable and comfort the afflicted,” so losing support of any kind is an inherent risk. And you know what? New readers and advertisers come along every day.

We do not resent dissenting opinions

Don’t agree with something we printed? We have a Letters to the Editor section for a reason. Take advantage of it. Hell, if you really feel your local paper needs some balance, offer to write a regular column in which you provide a counterpoint to whatever point the paper is trying to make. We won’t mind, really. You’re not stepping on our toes, you’re expanding our content.

We have feelings

I know you’d never know it, judging by how many TV news reporters you see sticking cameras in people’s faces and asking them how they feel about the horrible tragedy that just befell them, but we’re not soulless monsters. I personally abhor the practice of hounding someone after a terrible loss and would never do it. So if you ever call us up and start screaming at us for some reason…don’t. I’ve seen co-workers reduced to tears because someone decided the best way to inform us of an error in an obituary is to scream and hurl verbal abuse at whoever has the misfortune of picking up the phone. You wouldn’t take that kind of treatment from us, so don’t expect us to do so, cheerfully or otherwise.

We have lives

People have gotten quite cross with me when I tell them I can’t cover their Sunday morning event or I can’t meet them for an interview at 10 at night. The thought that I have a life outside of my job, and that I often put my life ahead of my job, is bizarre to some. Don’t get me wrong, I make concessions all the time. My wife has had to take a cab home more than once because I couldn’t be there to pick her up from the train as planned. But sometimes I need to not work. My job is part of my life, but it is not my life and never will be.

The views and opinions in the Enterprise blogs are those of the author and are not neccessarily shared by Falmouth Publishing.

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