10 ) Herman Cain won’t go away, he won’t be silenced, and he’s at peace with himself, with his wife, and his God…so why did he suspend his presidential campaign? Oh, right: to spare his family from the pain of having his many tawdry secrets revealed. It’s so much easier to keep things in your closet when the media doesn’t care about you.
9 ) On a related note, Newt Gingrich received Herman Cain’s endorsement — which matters a lot to that precious serial adulterer voter block.
8 ) Michele Bachmann gets schooled, twice, by young people challenging her stance on gay rights and same-sex marriage. The humor here stands on its own.
7 ) A Cathedral High School student costs his football team a major win by what game officials are calling an inappropriate display of unsportsmanlike behavior: he raised his arm as he took his final few strides into the end zone, then handed the ball to a referee. MONSTER!
6 ) Fox News commentator Eric Bolling rages against “The Muppets” as a tool of the liberal anti-capitalism movement. Proof positive: the spirit of Jim Henson DOES live on!
5 ) A new study finds that conservative-leaning TV viewers generally enjoy reality programming, including shows like “Mythbusters.” Wait, I thought conservatives hated science?
4 ) Tiger Woods wins a golf tournament, lifting him from “forgotten fallen icon” to status to “Oh, he’s still around?” status.
3 ) Coca-Cola lovers fly into a disproportionate rage over the new special-for-the-holidays-white Coke cans, claiming, not unreasonably, that the cans look too much like the silver Diet Coke cans — and, very unreasonably, that the soda in the white cans tastes different. If there any any psyche students out there, I think I found a good experiment for you.
2 ) Kris Humphries tries to have his marriage annulled on grounds of fraud. Dude, sorry, having breast implants does not constitute fraud.
1 ) A movie based on the “Where’s Waldo?” books moves forward. I think whoever gets cast as Waldo will soon be asking “Where’s my career?”
The views and opinions in the Enterprise blogs are those of the author and are not neccessarily shared by Falmouth Publishing.