10 ) The countdown begins to the Mayan End of the World! I’m sure the Mayans will prove much more reliable than that Camping guy.
9 ) Cape Wind scores another court victory and declares that it will begin construction within a year…although, considering the project’s track record so far, maybe we should read that as a “dog year.”
8 ) Ron Paul , who heads into the Iowa Caucus leading the polls, takes heat from Personhood USA because his pro-life stance is not hardcore enough. He refused to use Monty Python’s “Every Sperm in Sacred” song as his official campaign theme song.
7 ) Newt Gingrich fails to get on the Virginia ballot. But Virginia could care less after it realized Newt was courting Iowa behind its back.
6 ) Boston is declared America’s Drunkest City. WOO-HOO! We’re number three! We’re number thr– no, wait, I mean…uh, two? No, one! We’re number one! Shoot. Officer, can I start again?
5 ) Foxborough selectmen reject a plan to bring a casino to town. Very considerate of them not to hog all the cash cows, don’t you think?
4 ) Barnstable County commissioners finally fill the long-vacant and important — kinda, sorta, not really, a little, but not THAT important — county clerk position. Seriously, people, it’s not a super-critical job.
3 ) An MBTA employee gets a light reprimand for hacking an electronic sign to flash a clip of the lyrics to “Deck the Halls.” His punishment for duping commuters into believing the MBTA is run by thinking, caring human beings will be much more severe.
2 ) A fake People magazine cover proclaiming that Taylor Lautner (of “Twilight” fame and not much else) is gay fools the Internet for a half-hour or so. Twihards, got news for you: gay or straight, you’re never going to hook up with Lautner. Ever. Deal with it.
1 ) Sinead O’Connor ends her 16-day marriage to her fourth husband, claiming he was letting him go so he wouldn’t lose his disapproving family. Pictures of the Pope, her own marriage — is there nothing sacred this woman won’t tear to pieces?
The views and opinions in the Enterprise blogs are those of the author and are not neccessarily shared by Falmouth Publishing.