10 ) Mitt Romney wins the New Hampshire primary. Congrats, Mitt. Here’s your brand new larger bullseye to put on your back.
9 ) Rick Perry finished NH with less than one percent of the vote. Hey, that’s a pretty good showing! If you’re a wacko fringe third-party candidate.
8 ) Friendly’s closes more locations as it emerges from bankruptcy protection. Speaking of mediocre foodstuffs and financial difficulties…
7 ) Hostess faces a financial crisis and files for Chapter 11. Don’t worry, folks, Hostess as a company is as enduring as the shelf life of its Twinkies.
6 ) A New Hampshire voter attempted to vote using a dead man’s ID. After he was caught by election workers who knew the deceased, he claimed he was simply testing voter security. Next, he got to test the police department’s booking room and the court’s arraignment process.
5 ) New Jersey governor Chris Christie chided Obama for running a re-election campaign based in cynicism and fear-mongering. I think he’s just upset Obama is stealing from the GOP playbook.
4 ) Van Halen releases its first new single with David Lee Roth on vocals in 28 year. Too bad it’s not 1984…by which I mean the year, which is when Van Halen could last be called an awesome rock band.
3 ) At a New Hampshire debate, Newt Gingrich criticizes Mitt Romney for his “pious baloney” — which is, ironically, Newt’s old Secret Service code name.
2 ) Charlie Sheen declares that he’s “not crazy anymore.” Funny how not being all coked up can change your mental state!
1 ) Rapper Snoop Dogg gets arrested for marijuana possession. Big whoop. That’s like saying Willie Nelson got caught with weed.
The views and opinions in the Enterprise blogs are those of the author and are not neccessarily shared by Falmouth Publishing.