10 ) Catherine Greig immediately appeals eight-year prison sentence. The courts have advised her that her paperwork has gone missing, but they expect it to turn up in California in about 16 years.
9 ) The voters of Taunton approve a casino for the Mashpee Wampanoag Tribe. Yeah, good luck to you, Taunton. I’m sure you won’t get burned like Middleboro did. Speaking of Middleboro…
8 ) Middleboro institutes fines for swearing in public. Middleboro, this one’s for you:
7 ) The American Humanist Association plans to appeal a court ruling that keeps “under God” in the Pledge of Allegiance in a Massachusetts school district, thus proving atheists can also be myopic self-centered twits.
6 ) More than 30 years after the infamous incident, an Australian coroner determines that a dingo really did take Lindy Chamberlain-Creighton’s baby.
5 ) Falmouth High School seniors receive their diplomas but no invocation at their commencement ceremony. Amazingly, many of them will nevertheless go on to have happy, successful lives.
4 ) The Boston Herald freaks the hell out of website visitors by posting, openly and with no warnings, a picture of the Florida man who had much his face eaten off. It’s a sad day when the Boston Herald lacks tact and good taste.
3 ) A Falmouth woman gets arrested after approaching an unmarked police car she thought belonged to the drug dealers she planned to buy heroin from (allegedly). That’s why they call it dope indeed.
2 ) Burger King kills the bacon craze by announcing the debut of a bacon sundae. Speaking of ruining things I like…
1 ) Octomom Nadya Suleman draws a paycheck by participating in a “celebrity pillow fight” with a Philadelphia morning radio show host. I don’t know what makes me madder: the misuse of the term “celebrity” or the fact this will forever ruin for me the sexy pillow fight fantasy.
EDIT 6/26: Due to excessive spamming, the comments function for this entry has been turned off. E-mail me if you’re compelled to gripe about something posted here.
The views and opinions in the Enterprise blogs are those of the author and are not neccessarily shared by Falmouth Publishing.