10 ) In the wake of last week’s Supreme Court decision on Obamacare, Senator Rand Paul declares, “Just because a couple people on the Supreme Court declare something to be Constitutional does not make it so.” Someone needs to remind Sen. Paul what “a couple,” “Supreme Court,” and “Constitutional” mean.
9 ) A Florida lifeguard is fired for saving a swimmer who was outside his designated patrol area. He deserves it, frankly. Who puts a person’s welfare ahead of corporate loyalty anyway? America-haters, that’s who!
8 ) Mitt Romney flip-flops again, calling the health care mandate fee a tax after he previously insisted it wasn’t. At the rate he’s going, I’m expecting Mitt will have morphed into a black lesbian by the end of the campaign.
7 ) Occupy Boston is encouraging T riders to protest the recent fare hikes and service cuts by fare-jumping. What better way to protest increased fares by robbing the MBTA of more revenue — which could prompt them to increase the security presence, which will cost more money. Brilliant plan!
6 ) Anderson Cooper comes out of closet, proclaiming himself “gay and proud”…and a little miffed because the story was broken by Wolf Blitzer.
5 ) Andy Griffith passes away at the age of 86. I think whistling his funeral dirge might somehow undermine the mood.
4 ) “The Amazing Spider-Man” sets a July 4 box office record, and sends the message to Hollywood it’s never to early to reboot a franchise. Peter Jackson is already hard at work doing a new version of “The Hobbit,” which will premiere six months after his current version debuts in December.
3 ) Katie Holmes announces she is divorcing Tom Cruise. What? A Hollywood marriage is ending? Who saw that one coming?
2 ) David Ortiz says he feels “humiliated” that the Red Sox only offered him a one-year contract at $14.57 million — a $2 million raise from his salary last year. He mourned this indignity by consuming a case of Cristal in his gold-plated bathtub in house number three.
1 ) Apple plans to release a smaller version of its iPad. The working name is “Seriously, It’s Not Just an iPhone We’ve Re-Branded.”
The views and opinions in the Enterprise blogs are those of the author and are not neccessarily shared by Falmouth Publishing.